“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.
‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” – Ephesians 5:22–33 (ESV)
💍 Marriage Is a Gospel Mirror
Paul doesn’t begin with roles—he begins with revelation. He is showing us something bigger than human partnership. Marriage, according to Scripture, is a reflection of Christ’s relationship with His Church. That’s the lens we must use to understand everything else.
👰 Wives: Submitting as Unto the Lord
“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” This command, so often misunderstood or misused, is not about value or inferiority—it’s about trust and design. Paul is calling wives to voluntarily yield to their husbands’ loving leadership in the same spirit that the Church trusts and follows Christ.
It’s important to note:
- This is not a call to blind obedience or control.
- This is not a universal rule for women and men—it’s specific to marriage.
- This submission is rooted in love and reverence for Christ, not the worthiness of the husband.
🤵 Husbands: Loving as Christ Loved the Church
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…” The weight of this command is staggering. Christ’s love was sacrificial, sanctifying, selfless, and steadfast.
Paul doesn’t say, “Lead your wives,” though leadership is implied. He says, “Love her like Jesus loved you.” That means:
- Die to yourself daily.
- Put her needs before your own.
- Encourage her spiritual growth and security.
This is not domineering headship. This is cross-shaped leadership.
🛁 The Cleansing and Cherishing of Christlike Love
Paul describes how Christ sanctifies His Bride—the Church—“by the washing of water with the word.” This likely refers to both the symbolism of baptism and the ongoing work of God’s Word in purifying and beautifying the Church.
Likewise, a godly husband should create an environment where his wife is built up, not beaten down—where she flourishes in purity, purpose, and peace.
🪞 Love Her as Your Own Body
“He who loves his wife loves himself.” Marriage is not two people living parallel lives—it’s one new life lived together. Paul reminds us of Genesis 2:24: “The two shall become one flesh.”
To love your wife is to love your own body. To hurt her is to hurt yourself. Christ nourishes and cherishes His Church. Husbands are called to do the same for their wives.
🔍 A Profound Mystery Revealed
“This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.” Marriage isn’t just a romantic or cultural arrangement—it is a divine symbol. Every Christian marriage should preach the gospel by how spouses relate to each other.
That’s why Paul closes with clarity: “Let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” Love and respect are the heartbeat of a healthy, Christ-reflecting marriage.
📣 What This Means for Us Today
1. Marriage Is More Than Happiness—It’s Holiness
The goal of Christian marriage is not just personal fulfillment—it’s Christlike formation. It’s about reflecting Jesus in everyday faithfulness.
2. Submission and Sacrifice Go Hand-in-Hand
These roles are not weapons—they’re a witness. When both husband and wife walk in humility, grace, and love, the world sees a glimpse of heaven.
3. Christ Is the Center of a Lasting Marriage
No marriage will thrive by human effort alone. It takes Spirit-filled hearts, gospel-centered love, and daily surrender to the Lordship of Christ.
📣 Reflection and Application
- 💞 Wives: Am I following my husband with trust, not fear—and with love for Christ above all?
- 🛡️ Husbands: Am I loving my wife with the sacrificial heart of Jesus—not just in words but in actions?
- 🔍 Do others see the gospel in how we treat each other in our marriage?
🛐 Prayer
Father, thank You for the gift and calling of marriage. Help husbands to love with the heart of Christ, and wives to respond with the respect and trust of the Church. Let every Christian home become a reflection of Your grace—a picture of the gospel in action. In Jesus’ name, amen.
📌 Coming Up Next
Ephesians 6:1–9 — How Do We Live the Gospel at Home and at Work?
In the next passage, Paul gives practical wisdom for families and workplaces. We’ll see how children, parents, servants, and masters are all called to reflect Christ in their daily relationships.
